I thought a truck was about to crash into us and I instinctively said “wHOA THERE BUCKAROO” I could have died and those would have been my last words
people who do math homework in pen are fearless
how the fuck do you remember your url
DO PARENTS NOT REALISE YOU CAN HEAR THEM TALKING ABOUT YOU
Hey that band you like is on tv
*Bashes through my door
*Trips down stairs
*Slips on the floor
*Runs into wall
*Army rolls through the kitchen
*Skids around the corner
*Dives onto couch
Shutup or i'll fucking murder you all
oh god so earlier today my dad and i came back from grocery shopping and we were putting everything away and he pulls a box of my tampons out of the bag and turns to me and says
“where do these go?”
and there was kind of this awkward moment of silence before i went “…my vagina”
and then he kind of just fell over and nearly cried
and was like “WHICH CUPBOARD ASDGHJ”
things that cause me a mental breakdown
- slow internet connection
- losing something i held a second ago
- kids screaming for no reason
- girls with annoying voices
- math
- my mom
- arguing with stupid people